i wanted to assassinate December...

I am totally starting to hyperventilate about the holidays. Everything’s closing in and I don’t even have school to blame. Who are you freaks who finish all your shopping by Thanksgiving? I hate you.

On the plus side, I have developed a sudden intolerance for any caffeine after 3 p.m. (after how many years of drinking gallons of coffee, night or day?!) and I’ve spent three of the last five nights tossing and turning. Last night was the worst. After a half-cup (a small cup) of coffee I was awake until 3 a.m. I did get some baking done and also balanced my checkbook and figured out holiday cards and cleaned up part of the office and did the dishes and watched the Kings game and read the newspaper. But still. Three-freaking-a.m. I am not going to be very happy if this no-caffeine-in-the-afternoon-or-evening thing sticks because I love my late-day coffee. And really, I’m getting too old to have to be changing habits now. Then again, maybe I should embrace this no-sleep thing because there is still a ton to be done between now and next Sunday and my goal, for once in my adult life, is to not have to Christmas shop on my birthday. Is that too much to ask? I don’t think so.

Why do I put myself through this every year anyway? Because in some weirdly perverse way I like the stress. Mostly, actually, I like the sparkly, frosty beauty of all things December and that helps me deal with the stress and not hide in the bedroom with a sleep mask and ear plugs.

Although, judging by last night's toss-and-turn fest, maybe that's not a bad idea.

Bring on the coffee...